22 intentions of my 22nd year

1.Say yes more often
2.Be open to grace
3.Try and find beauty everywhere, even in the mundane
4.Give people the benefit of the doubt
5.Think before I speak and don’t speak just to hear my own voice
6.Show intensity and passion in my work
7.Find joy in my work and be grateful for the opportunities that are given to me
8.Honor the light in everyone
9.I will leave this place soon, but I want to leave with grace and dignity
10.Work on solutions, don’t focus of the problems
11.Practice random acts of grace
12.Choose to be happy and surround myself with positivity
13.Have the same action and intention
14.Accept
15.Things are not the cause of joy.
16.Be more like my younger self
17.Choose love
18.Breathe
19.Enjoy the journey, Elana. Thanks Mom
20.Mediate everyday
21.Smile and laugh everyday
22.Be thankful for my roots. They ground me.

post secret
im 22, im trying to be ok.


dear bear
i want you to be in ri

P.S.

PS I am determined to have a GREAT vday weekday. Starting it off right. VINO.
Also, I started working in the pattern archivals today. It is amazing. More on that later.

emoting

I wish I was better at emoting. I’m not good at it. Unless you’ve known me for X amount of years or seen me naked, I guess. I could come up with a list of "I wishes" about myself but that’s no fun. And I'm trying to be more....open to grace and honoring the light in everyone....including myself.


I saw Jason Mraz last night. First sober concert I’ve ever been to at that Ryan Center. I must say I was impressed. I listened to him quite a lot, a long time ago, but the mainstream non-sense turns me off generally and makes me think their music will become cookie cutter. But he was the same. Great Lyrics. Great Voice. Great Vibe.

Also Ive started listen to Adele. She's so sad sounding in that soulful Etta James kinda way.

Elana, please note. Dont write posts when youve been drinking

I just saw this today. I like it.

Sooo Tired

Auditions are over. Im pleased. It took four days but PORTIA aaahhhhhh. I havnt slept more than 10 hours in 3 day.
PS I Love You is an entertaining movie. I guess. I have this ambivalent relationship with movies like this. I mean ..yay... great romance...i wish.... but really that stuff never, almost never, happens. So although i enjoy the movie i aslo hate myself and the movie. OY.

Life and JLM

Audition are going well. From my point. Outside of the room....not so hot. We are going to run behind. Thats just has to be accepted. I am doing my best to keep it going but it's sad when being on time is not even an option. Once we hit the "over-time" mark, there is no coming back and a little part of me dies. BUT (huge but) inside of the room is going smooth. TOUCH WOOD.

My new obsession is with a song called "For Today" by Jessica Lea Mayfield. I've heard it many times because Leo loves her and has seen her perform. For whatever reason, right now its just really sticking to me. This girl is nineteen and so talented.

Crazy things she does during show.

Twenty days.

Twenty days.



I'm making pot roast in the slow cooker tonight for dinner. I hope it isnt overdone.
I love our new house. I am sitting in the living room watching the light fade through our thousands of windows.
I want Anthony Bourdain's job. Post Kitchen Confidential.

Weather etc

Subsitute teacher is yoga. booo. But it was good class just a load of back bends.
Its going to snow on Tuesday and Wednesday. I hope people are on time. Running late makes me cring.

Heated Yoga

My bones are cold. Its from all this damn snow. So I am making myself go to yoga. I love this class and the teacher but I still have to make myself go. I know I need it. I need to warm up. I need to get relaxed and focused for this week. Merchant Auditions in two days. I am excited and do feel prepared but I hope I dont get in there and get flustered. I've got to go or Ill be late. Myspacebar issticking.